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The Friday Awards: Monday Edition

The Friday Awards: Monday Edition

By Contributor

HAGS sent us The Friday Awards at 7:30 p.m. on Friday. We were already out salsa dancing! —Sparkitors

Why hello there! You have found your way to last week’s Friday Awards!

This week, the obsession of this Sparklewarder (other than YouTube and SparkLife, of course) has been piñatas. I keep remembering my last piñata, which looked like this. Those were the days. More than just the piñatas themselves, I've been obsessing over the candy that goes in the piñatas. Only 6 more days till Stuff Your Face With Can.. I mean, Halloween! Yay!

Now, I shall keep this week’s introduction short so I can go back to thinking of all the candy I’m going to eat.

Don’t forget to write interesting things you are going to do for next week’s Sparkler of the Week!

You should all know that every time you write comments thanking us for doing this, someone in HADS becomes so happy they leak sunshine out of their ears, which is usually a problem only caused by the awesomeness that is Auntie SparkNotes and Dan. So we all want to thank you for your awesomeness!

This week’s thing to think about is: if you were stuck on a deserted island and could only have one book to read, what book would it be?

Now, to the awards!

The Redvines! Award goes to QuirkySpark for this comment on What Literary Characters Would Be for Halloween:

I think Voldemort would try to dress up as Ron, to get to Harry. But it would fail, because Voldemort is sad and lame, even when dressed up as The Ron X Weasley. (Ron changed his name so it was spelled with a The, and he changed his middle name from Bilious to X. Just X.)

Snape would dress up as the Spirit of Sadness and sit at home with the lights out so no kids would ask him for candy.

The Awesomesauce Nicknames Award goes to theoreticalgrrl for this comment on What It’s Like Being a Band Geek:

My clarinet is Wilkie (full name: William Shakespeare. Uh huh.) My tenor sax is Big Bertha. She was almost Sexy Sadie, but I decided that since she was old, she couldn't be really sexy.

The Newbie Embarrassment Award goes to Suporna for this comment on What It’s Like to Live In...Westport, Connecticut:

Yeah, well, confidence isn't always the key. -nervous laugh-
I remember back in 9th grade, I was in a new high school. I wanted to impress everyone, so I rushed into the first bathroom, changed out of my boring jeans and shirt that my friend had told me to wear, and threw on a nice blouse and a skirt. I exited that bathroom with a spring in my step and a radiant smile on my face. My confidence was overwhelming, and everywhere I went, I could see people stopping and looking at me.

No one bothered to tell me that my skirt was tucked into the waistband of my underwear.

The Extreme Cola Drinker Award goes to Agent X for this comment on What Your Soft Drink Says About You:

i'm a cola drinker!
proof: i turned my pet turtle into a drum

The Nothing Beats Water Award goes to lleya for this comment on the same post:

I drink water. I think that means I'm made of awesomesauce and epicness.

….and to amanda_bear23 for her concurrence:
I concur. H2O is better than all yer fizzy drinks because it can be recognized by multiple names as well as its scientific name. Can anyone tell me what Aqua Acidi Carbonici is? I think not. (No I did not make that up.)

The Accepting Crushed Dreams Awards go to the following Sparklers for their comments on the same post:

GotQuiddtich?: Wait did Dan just say that Santa Clause is not real?! Does that mean that all these years my parents have been lying to me about where the gifts that magically appear under the chirstmas tree have been coming from? How could they do such a thing? Does mean that the easter bunny and the tooth fairy aren't real either?

I think I have just lost hope in all humanity. Excuses me while I go cry uncontrollably.

W-w-wait.... What....?

S-santa.... isn't real??? D:

AngryHobbits: Santa--what--wh--Santa--Santa DOESN'T EXIST?
Then where did the, the presents? Candy canes? Stockings? Death Ray? That was...that was all from my PARENTS!?!?!
are you saying my mother LIED to me?!
NO! NO I WON'T ACCEPT IT! NO--YOU'RE WRONG! YOU'RE ALL WRONG!
NO!!!!!!

YOU. WILL. NOT. CRUSH. MY. DREAMS.

*Destroys Sparknotes with Death Ray*

The You’ll Get In Trouble If You Stay In That Class Awards go to the following Sparklers for their comments on 8 Quotes from the Most Ridiculous School on Earth:

thegirliscrafty: This is my health teacher introducing a new topic:

"OK girls, we've finished with bullying now, and over the next few lessons we'll be doing drugs. We'll start of with legal drugs such as alcohol and caffeine today, and then next lesson we'll be doing heroin and so on."

cherishs96: Math teacher: THERE IS NO THINKING INVOLVED IN MATH! So stop asking questions or you'll get a referral!

The Stage Eight Represent! Award goes to illusiondestiny for this comment on The Five Stages of SparkLife:

Well I can say that I went through all 5 of these steps! but somehow skipped Stage 6 …

Stage 7: Rehab

Your grades are dropping because you’re spending too much time on Sparklife. You try to shut off your computer so you won’t go on it so much. But you spend every awake second wondering what new posts they have…which leaves to…

Stage 8: Back to Addiction

You go back to Sparklife. The end!

not that I would know from experience…heehee

The SparkLove Award goes to Kolizzle for this comment on the same post:

I love Sparklife and its Sparklers because they helped me develop my photography skills AND Sparklers are some of the most inspiring and encouraging people I know

The We Want To Go, But Only If We Get To Go With You As Zefron! Award goes to Real Alias for this comment on Halloween Costumes: Couples' Edition:

My friend and I are going as Voldemort and Professor Quirrel, AVPM.

The Rambling Award goes to super_deluxe for this comment on Auntie SparkNotes: Something To Talk About:

Or you could talk about food.

Or you could talk about Harry Potter.

Or you could talk about Harry Potter's dad.

Or you could talk about Harry Potter's godfather.

Or you could talk about Harry Potter's dad and godfather's best friend who isn't wormtail.

Or you could talk about mexican food. But don't mention the digestion factor.

Or you could talk about classes. Or glasses. Or vases. Or laces. Or a fox. Or a box. Or a house. Or a mouse. Or here. Or there. Or anywhere. Or green eggs and ham. Or Sam I Am. Or a train. Or rain. Or a car. Or...wait...or...OH MY GOSH I FORGOT THIS....I got this I got this I got this I got this I got this I got this I got this I got this...or a bar? no that's too pg...or Jafar...or tar...or *cries* I GIVEUP!

The Logic Award goes to Alicerocksyoursocks for this comment on the same post:

The best thing to say is "fat penguins" because fat penguins break the ice.

The We’re Not Sure If We Could Maturely Use That Notebook… Award goes to rainfire113 for this comment on 10 Ways To Save the Planet:

You know, there's paper and notebooks made of elephant poop (disinfected, of course). That certainly helps the planet.

The Our Minds Were Just Blown. Like, To Smithereens. Award goes to lleya for this comment on the same post:

You know what's curious? Why saving the environment is called "going green". I mean, why green? Sure, trees have green leaves most of the year, but they have brown trunks ALL year long.
Maybe it's because we associate brown with poop. "Going brown" sounds like a slogan for diarrhea medicine.
Hm. It could still be called "going blue" though.

The What?! LLAMAS?! WHERE?!! Award goes to FrolickingSheep for this comment on What Kind of Pet Is Best For You?:

and OHMYWERD I CAN ORDER A LLAMA!!!?? AHHHHH!!! *runs off to phone*=

The Mom! I Want A Pet Penguin Too! Award goes to evielee_17 for this comment on the same post:

my friend has a penguin... no joke. she even has a little shed-freezer thing in the backyard for it. she saw the idea in a book and her parents BOUGHT it for her!!

The I Killed My Pet Stick By Accident Once – That Takes Skill Award goes to LaGitanaRoja for this comment on the same post:

STICKS
Sticks are ideal if you lack the intelligence, common sense and brainpower required to keep an animal alive. A pet stick is portable, quiet, calm, does not need food and it's great for people short of a little cash. Minor drawback of not being very....exciting, but an ideal pet for a busy girl on the go.
Caretaking Experience Summarized In One Word: Relaxed, boring, easy - Reasing!
Possible Cute Name: Stick

The We Love Not-Yelling Eloquently To Solve Our Problems Award goes to firewordsparkler for this comment on 10 Reasons Model UN Is Awesome:

I love debating and yelling at my opponent to shut up. Well, I do it more eloquently, and it's more of a shut-down than a "shut up," but the fact that one gets to intelligently prove that he/she is better than everyone else because he/she could come up with an awesome solution feels pretty good.

The Auntie Similarities Award goes to BroccoliBiatch for this comment on the post about Kat's High School Life:

The only thing I took from this is that you had green hair when you were in high school and this therefore means I will grow up to be awesome like you as I just recently bleached out my green hair. Rad.

Oh, and hi Kat's mum!

The We Don’t Judge, Especially Not If We Agree Award goes to SuperNinjaQueen for this comment on Cotillion, Demystified:

I wish my school had had this! Don't judge me; it sounds really fun! And I could also use the practice in becoming slightly more coordinated.
Actually, though, it would make me feel like I know something, am something. All my friends have their own little thing, and I am just the girl who barely make it through with no special talent, gift, or hobby. Pooh.

The Rap Of The Day Award goes to peaceonearth34 for this comment on Do You Remember NaNoWriMo?:

I tried this last year...FAIL.

But this year, I WILL PREVAIL!!!

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is my NaNoWriMo Rap!

The So Do We Award goes to SecretlyAWizard for this comment on Confessions of a Boarding School Transplant:

Hmm. When I think of boarding school, I think of Hogwarts. Obviously. :]

The Bright Side Award goes to ashmeadow for this comment on the same post:

But Sparkler, all the graffiti in the bathroom is the perfect chance to practice spelling and grammar corrections. There's nothing like SAT Prep while you pee. Yay! 

The Weird Hobbies Award goes to madlibs25 for this comment on Blogging Breaking Dawn: Part 17:

"I'm no relationship expert, but I don't think women enjoy being stared at and silently judged by shirtless barefoot men."

*raises NONsarcasm hand* I enjoy being judged by shirtless barefoot men.

The Amazingly Insightful And Valid Point Award goes to ZeldaMcFly for this comment on the same post:

so ummm... i'm not sure i want to know the answer, but...

if the reason bella gets up is because her bladder is full, what happens to it when they rush her to the operating room?

The This Is Funnier Because You Might Actually Be Serious Award to mjpink414 for this comment on In Defense of Lady Gaga:

I'm probably the only person on here who knows this. Everyone's probably gonna call me crazy. But I just have to say it: Lady Gaga worships satan. Her videos have all kinds of occultic symbols in them. Increasing her fame and fans who defend her is exactly what they want.

But before anyone calls me crazy, I want you to SEARCH IT.

The Technicalities Award goes to super_deluxe for this comment on Almost-Free Image Makeover:

I just wanted to say, THERE IS NO WAY THE MARKER AND TAPE COSTS 2 CENTS! Maybe the amount of INK you use in relation to the marker, and the amount of TAPE used in relation to the tape roll (though, I think it'd be more around 5 cents for the tape), BUT you HAVE to take into consideration that THIS IS SOOOO NOT POSSIBLE, unless you ALREADY have all of the stuff. In which case it would technically cost 0 dollars and 0 cents.

THANK YOU. GOOD DAY!

The Best Exclamation Award goes to MarauderPrincess for this comment on Dinosaur Movies that Rock:

HOLY SNARGALUFF PODS!

The Best Defense Award goes to Amanda_bear23 for this comment on Auntie SparkNotes: The Girlfriend Box:

I got major creeper vibes as soon as I read your letter. Trust me, I'm an expert on creeps. I major in Edwardquilology, which is the study of stalker/creeps and pedophiles. Your "Mark" falls under the "Edward" category. If he writes you a lullaby, light him on fire.

The Terrifying But Kind Of Awesome Award goes to sgtpepper191 for this comment on Blogging My Abseiling Experience:

In grade school, we went on a trip to a cave. Some water dripped on my head from a stalactite, and I was fully convinced for about a week that I was going to grow a stalagmite on my forehead like some bizarre human-unicorn hybrid. It was terrifying.

The That Sound Like An Amazing Opportunity To Finally Use That Dress Made Of Shark Skin Award goes to kimbo-slice-of-apple-pie for this comment on A Complete Guide to Party Favors for the Sophisticated Young Adult:

One time we had a party themed "Cinderella goes to Hawaii and is captured by evil space monkeys and their albino leader and then they all get eaten by a shark."
It was in honor of shark week. best. party. ever.

The We Hope You’re Not Going To Sue Us For Damages Award goes to BrandNewEyes for her comment on How To Throw an Anti-Halloween Party:

The misspelling in the picture isn't bothering me at all. Why, you ask? Because I took a Sharpie, crossed it out, and wrote the correct spelling next to it. I hope my family doesn't care that there will forever be a big scribble on the computer screen and the word "DEFINITELY" in huge black letters next to it.

The Obviously Award goes to sgtpepper191 for this comment on the same post:

Calm down, everyone. Obviously, the dictionary gurus changed the spelling of the word we know now as "definitely," and the Sparkitors are just in the loop before everyone else, as always.

LOL Points go to…

fortunesfavoritefool for this comment on 8 Quotes from the Most Ridiculous School on Earth:

My World history teacher is probably the craziest teacher ever.
1. When we were playing two truths and a lie: " I have a glass eye, my mother shot me once, and I once ate a turtle."
me: "Your mom never shot you?"
teacher: "no they all were true"
2. "You know why Russia isn't attacking us right now?!!? because every American has a gun in their house"
3. "Charlie is in the bush, waiting for you to mess up..."
4. "LISTEN UP!!!!" *slams ruler on desk, resulting in it snapping in two* "this is weird"
5. "*shouts my name wicked loud in a Boston accent" me: "Yes?" teacher "oh nothing I just like saying your name, *shouts my name"
6. while talking to me "you know you're one of the few people I could see ruling the world in 15 years, and you'll probably put me in a dungeon with her *points to stupidest id in class*"
7. "I know my family is just waiting for me to die so they can get my money, but II;m not giving it to anyone...hmmm.. I'll give it to you *points at me*"
8 "Can I adopt you?" me: "i have a dad you know!"
9. "I went to my brothers wedding last weekend..." random kid:"do you have pictures can we see them?" teacher: *glares* "NO!!! I hate you, I'm going t show them to people I like" *takes out pictures and hands them to me*
I wanted to get out of this awkward situation so I shuffled the pictures super fast, he's right behind me and he yells you have to see them closely! then he does a 360 and points out his sister and her boyfriend. This happened in the middle of class

aleyna22 for this comment onWhat Literary Characters Would Be for Halloween:

Voldemort would be Michael Jackson, since neither of them have a nose.

Superhero001 for this comment also on What Your Soft Drink Says About You:

Woah. Woah, woah, woah.
I love Root Beer. I also ride horses, am an explorer AND a scholar, a slight Kleptomaniac, have always been fairly good at history, and I hate gym.

Have you been stalking me??

-Checks ceiling for camera's-

horcruxnumber7 for this on the same post:

You know you're a southerner when you see "Cola" and think, "But what kind of Cola? And why isn't 'Coke' on this list?"

Lady_Sunshine3 for this comment on Blogging My Abseiling Experience:

wow youre really brave Hanini!
the closest i get to abseiling is getting out of my bed in the morning (and trust me, at 6:30 in the morning getting out of bed and landing on your butt on the floor is indeed like abseiling)

DazedinLife10 for this comment on Why I Hate the PSATs:

I never understood the whole "you can not discuss the contents of the test with anyone via any method of communication". How are they supposed to know if you ask your friend what they got for a question during lunch? Do they spy on you? When they take up your cellphones during testing, are they implanting something in them to eavesdrop on your conversations? Maybe the PSAT people have agents with Invisibilty Cloaks and they stalk you all day.

8blue_jay8 for this comment on How To Throw an Anti-Halloween Party:

Why don't people come to Australia where Halloween is hardly celebrated? Now that's anti-halloween.

The gummybeararmygeneral Sparkler of the Week Award goes to: abbyiscool13 for letting us all know what it feels like to cry in a handstand.  Also, for having a username that made this song get stuck in gummybeararmygeneral’s head, which she doesn’t mind since it’s one of her favorites.

Topics: The Internets
Tags: the friday awards

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