Auntie SparkNotes: For the Love of Cats

Like today's letter writers, we love cats. In a platonic way. —Sparkitors

Dear Auntie Sparknotes,
I have a problem. I am in love. The thing is, it's not that kind of love.

That is, it's kittens.
I am in love with kittens.

You see, I have always loved cats, all the way up to Cats the musical. I have always really really REALLY REALLY REALLY SUPER REALLY wanted one. But my mom doesn't like them, and she's afraid of them. I apologize if I sound really young and immature. Because the problem is, I AM young. (Younger than most Sparklers, I think.) And I have at least 5 years till I can move out. This is the thing that is killing me in this case because I have to wait over 5 years till I can finally get a cat. My friends and teachers all have cats. We even have a group of stray kittens under my porch, and I feed them every day. The problem is, I can't even make friends with the kittens, because (being feral) they are afraid of me. And I have to turn them over to a shelter real soon. I have considered volunteering at a cat shelter, but I am busy after school and anyway, I think I'm too young. The real problem here is that:

a.) I love cats.
b.) I really want one, and have wanted one for my whole life.
c.) my mom is afraid of cats and generally dislikes them.
d.) OVER 5 YEARS!!
e.) Did I mention that I really want one, and have wanted one for my whole life?

Maybe I should just be patient, but 5 years seems like an ETERNITY! What should I do?

Before we get to the advice-giving, Auntie would just like to express how very, extremely relieved she is that this letter did not turn out to be about an actual human-cat romance. Not just because I would have had to report said romance to the ASPCA, but also because it would only be a matter of time before the whole sordid ordeal was picked up by the media and then adapted for a Lifetime Original Movie with a cringingly terrible title—something like "The Love That Purred," or "Hairballs on My Pillow, Claw Marks in My Heart" or "Kissing Mister Catterpants: My Secret Shame."

And if there's one thing the world doesn't need, it's another Lifetime Original Movie about cat love.

As for your problem, Sparkler, the unfortunate fact is that your parents do get final say when it comes to pets. If your mom dislikes and fears cats, you can't force her to open her home to one and take on the expense and effort of feeding it, taking it to the vet, etc. But that doesn't mean you can't talk about it—particularly if you haven't had a conversation that goes beyond you saying, "I want a cat!" and your mother saying, "Over my dead body!"

So, approach your mom politely and ask whether there are any circumstances under which she would consider getting a cat. It can't hurt to discuss it, and there's always a chance that she'd be more amenable to, say, having a cat that lived exclusively outside. See whether you've got any common ground, and go from there. And if nothing else, you'll come away from the conversation with a better idea of where she's coming from—whether it's that she's afraid of being clawed, or that she doesn't like cat hair, or that her whole family was murdered by cats back in the 1970s and she's never really gotten over it.

The caveat: You can only have this conversation once—no whining or wheedling—and you have to be respectful of whatever she says, even if you think it's ridiculous. (Unless it's the "murdered by cats" thing, in which case you should smile, back slowly out of the room, and then quietly call the police.)

And if you still come up empty-handed after that convo, don't despair. Sure, it sucks that you can't have a cat of your own, but you can still get your feline fix by offering yourself up as a cat-sitter, visiting your cat-owning friends, and volunteering at a cat shelter—which, by the way, is a really great idea that you shouldn't discard just because you're busy after school. You're never too young to volunteer, and it's a totally rewarding activity that looks great on your resume. If you're interested in doing it, it's absolutely worth making time for.

So, talk to your mom, let your friends know that you're in the market for cat-sitting gigs, and hop on the internet to find your nearest animal shelter in need of volunteers. And let us know how it goes!

I'll just be here, watching the groundbreaking Lifetime Original Movie, "Purrfectly Evil: The Cat That Killed."

Do you love cats? No, I mean, do you LOVE cats? (Yes? ...Pervert.) Leave your comments below, and to get advice from Auntie, send an email to advice@sparknotes.com! You can also friend her on Facebook.