How to Throw a Proper Pity Party

We don't really have any reason to throw a pity party, but Iamacelebrity23's shindig sounds like so much fun that we're going to do it anyway!— Sparkitors

All of us have days when we feel totally hopeless about ever having a relationship. But should we bury our faces on our pillows and sob for hours? No! The best way to deal with loneliness is to hold a "pity party" for yourself and all of your single friends (no people with boyfriends allowed!). I'm here to provide you with instructions for hosting the best pity party your city has ever seen.

Step #1: FOOD, FOOD, FOOD!
What is a party without food? For pity parties, junk food is the obvious choice: load up on ice cream, fudgy brownies, underbaked chocolate chip cookies, and rice crispies (homemade, of course)! If you want to splurge on dinner too, go for pizza, Chinese food, or anything greasy and fried.

Step #2: Movies
If you don't have the movies, you don't have a party. Nicholas Sparks movies are perfect for this occasion. Try A Walk to Remember, Dear John, The Notebook, and The Last Song... all tear-jerkers guaranteed to make you sob like a 15 year-old girl (which you probably are).

Step #3: Supplies
You must prepare for many tears during these parties, especially considering the movie list. So don't forget to buy a box (or ten) of two-ply tissues, and an empty garbage can to throw them away in.

Step #4: Music
Compile the perfect playlist for the night. Songs like Use Somebody by Kings of Leon or Before He Cheats by Carrie Underwood are great for dancing to and singing along with at top volume.

Step #5: Did someone say Band Hero?
Yes, Band Hero is a must. Just being able to sing and play your favorite songs lets you escape into a parallel universe, where, for a moment, you're onstage with thousands of screaming fans cheering you on. It's fun, it's a confidence booster, and if nothing else, it will definitely make you laugh.

Step #6: PJs
Wearing comfy pajamas is a requirement. Why dress up and put on makeup if you're just going to be jumping around and bawling your eyes out anyway? Comfort is the way to go.

Step #7: Sleeping Stations
Each person should have a cushy and cozy sleeping area. Pile up the pillows, blankets, and sleeping bags, and make sure everyone has a bowl of candy within reach. It's key to be comfy, since you and all of your buds will probably be up all night.

What are your ideas for the ultimate pity party?

Related post: The Birthday Party Do NOT Invite List