We've foreseen the ultimate Ultimate Fighting Championship of our lifetime (Harry v. Edward). We've imagined the smack-downs between some of our favorite literary characters. Now we take the cage match back to the drawing board (literally), Itchy and Scratchy-style. Who would win in a fight between these animated characters? Llllllllet's get ready to ruuuuuuumble!
Cruella de Vil v. Maleficent
Scary ladies, these two. It's skunk stripe versus medieval fashion faux pas. Maleficent would go into an asthmatic attack because she's allergic to dogs and cigarette smoke. She would, however, have remembered her inhaler, and upon recovering, would turn herself into a fire-breathing dragon, scorching Cruella's fur coat right off her. Winner: Maleficent.
The Little Mermaid v. Princess Jasmine
Sea versus air. Jasmine swoops down on her magic carpet, tugging at Ariel's hair. As Ariel tries to fight her off, Sebastian pinches at Jasmine while Scuttle divebombs her. Ariel and Jasmine tumble off the rock and into the ocean, where unfortunately, Jasmine drowns and becomes a Poor Unfortunate Soul. Winner: Ariel. (Losers: Jonas Brothers.)
Scrooge McDuck v. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
At first glance, this seems like an unfair match-up, since the heroes in a half-shell have nunchucks and samurai swords. But the winner would be Uncle Scrooge, who dips into his vault and hires an assassin. Loser: Us. (No more Turtle Tips voiced by Keanu Reeves.)
Cinderella v. Snow White
Don't underestimate these two scrappy girls—Cinderella's got grit, and Snow White grew up with seven brothers. The fight starts when Cinderella tells Snow White she could stand to get some sun. Snow White responds by calling Cinderella "a tease." Cinderella cracks the glass slipper over Snow White's head, threatening her with a jagged shard. Snow White does a roundhouse kick to knock the glass from her hand. After a tussle, Snow White pins Cinderella to the ground and sits on her, gagging her with a poisoned apple. Winner: Snow White.
Homer Simpson v. Peter Griffin
Peter calls Homer a "poophead" and laughs. Homer says, "Why I oughta!" and starts to strangle him. With the exertion of energy, both collapse in exhaustion and decide to prank call Geico instead. Winner: Us.
Got any animated character throw-downs you'd like to see?
Related post: Literary Throw-Down
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