The Lowdown on Book Sharing

Sparkler OpaquePlatelets is practically a Rhodes Scholar when it comes to book sharing. Here, she rates four methods of book sharing with a nifty Pencil Rating System—one pencil is the lowest score, five is the highest. The result will surely change your classroom experience FOREVER. —SparkNotes Editors

Desk Straddling

Place one half of said textbook on your desk and the other half on your partner’s desk. The spine will sag between your desks and almost pull the book to the floor unless both of you keep one hand clamped on each side. This usually results in lots of giggling and little to no reading, as half the book is obscured by fingers and neither of you is paying attention anyway.

Rating: Two Pencils. Desk straddling is more trouble than it’s worth.

Book Hogging

Without even asking, your partner puts the whole book on his/her desk and sort of angles it toward you so neither of you can actually read anything. When it comes time to turn the page, your partner turns the book back to face him/herself, and never re-rotates it back to its original, equally unhelpful position. You and your assignment are doomed.

Rating: One Pencil for you, Five Pencils for your partner (but your partner gets five Stinky Pencils for being such a greedy jerk).

Verbalizing

You and your partner take turns reading the book out loud to each other. Benefits of this method include being able to use funny voices/accents and distracting everyone so you finish first (which can sometimes earn you extra credit). A major downside to this method is if either/both of you are slow readers or stumble over long words (like cholecystokinin), nobody will actually learn anything because you’ll both be too busy laughing at each other’s facial contortions.

Rating: Three Pencils, because who doesn’t jump at the chance to use a British accent?

Capitulating

You end up doing all the reading and all the work while your partner paints her nails or makes “That’s what she said” jokes with her buddies at the next table. The only downside to this is that you have to do everything yourself. Major benefits include: YOU LEARN SOMETHING, and after class you can tell your teacher about your partner’s failure to participate, ensuring that your partner won’t get credit for your work.

Rating: Five Pencils, because you win and your lazy partner loses.

Which book sharing method would you award a Five Pencil rating to, Sparklers? What other methods do you use?

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