Pets have feelings. They think about things. They have dreams and favorite pastimes. It's not always easy to tell what's going on in your pet's mind. But pay close attention, and you can sometimes read your pet's behavior. Here are some signs to look out for:
DOG
Jumps on furniture = Excited
Chews on furniture = Bored and starved for attention, or frustrated by Plato's theory of forms
Stares longingly while wagging tail = Wants to be scratched
Paws at door until you let it out, then paws at door until you let it back in = Confused, or trying to show you that your current on-again-off-again relationship is futile, and you should probably just do something else with your time.
CAT
Purrs = Hungry
Wanders from room to room = Hungry
Meows for hours on end = Hungry
Watches birds through window = Curious, hungry
GUINEA PIG
Sits motionless, except for steady breathing = Thoughtful
Squeals all night long = Painfully contemplative
PARROT
Perches in cage = Wonders why other birds can fly and it can't
Jerks its head around and blinks = No, seriously, why aren't other birds in cages?
Mimics what you say and whistles = Somebody, please, let me out of this cage.
GOLDFISH
Swims around in slow circles = Wondering what's up with that little plastic castle
Suddenly switchbacks, then swims in opposite direction = There's also a little plastic pirate ship. Crazy.
Dives deeper, swims diagonally = Look! A castle!
TARANTULA
Sits still = Angry.
Moves slowly = Angry.
Moves quickly = Furious.
RABBIT
Chews carrot = Satisfied.
Scratches ear with hind leg = Agitated, then satisfied.
Looks around = Afraid of ambush by French chef.
Hops to other end of cage = Looking for mate.
Rests head = Couldn't find mate. Remembers napping is just as good.
CRAYFISH
Sits on bottom of fishtank for entire lifetime = Content
Does your pet do weird stuff? Like what?
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