Fake 'n' Break

It’s nearly spring break. While all the "cool kids" are running off to Cancun and coming back with an ugly head full of braids, some of us will have to while away a week or two at the lowly “Mi Casa Resort and Spa.” If you won’t be embarking on a braggable vacation in the next few weeks, here are some awesome staycations to make your time off interesting, if nothing else.

1. Visit your local tanning salon and set up chairs next to the bed. Bonus points if you can score some sand to replicate the beach experience.
2. Two words: Olive Garden. It ain't Italy, but it's an endless salad bowl and breadsticks, ftw!
3. Stand really close to the lions' den at the zoo. Feel like you're on an African safari yet? No? Well, don't stick your hand in. We don't like lawsuits here at SparkNotes (too boring).
4. Going to sports games is so overrated. Get the same experience for free by watching the game at home, while your unruly uncle sits behind you cussing at the referee, yelling, and spilling beer on you.
5. Have you ever noticed how splashing around in your bathtub can totally feel like a wave pool? Goggles are optional.
6. Designate a specific hour of the day “crappy hour,” in which you listen to bad mariachi music, and all beverages must have a paper umbrella in them.
7. Climb a tree and pretend you’re R. Patz. You don’t even have to get a tan!
8. Kite + skateboard = windsurfing. Don’t say we never taught you anything.
9. Create your own fake vacation photo album. The Leaning Tower of Pisa isn’t next to the Pyramids? Well, how would you know, you’ve never been!
10. Souvenir shop at the thrift store. Sure it’s fun to get a t-shirt that says “Cancun Spring Break 2010,” but how about one that says “Daytona Beach Dance Off 1978”?? That’s right, you time traveled on your vacation. BOOYAH!

What are your spring break plans?

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