What It's Like to Live In...Hampshire, England

rosefan42, we ARE SO gonna marry Prince William! You're mean! * runs away crying* —SparkNotes editors

As American people (or maybe just those Americans who Sparkle and/or post to MLIA and/or are shown in Love Actually) are pretty obsessed with all things British, I thought I’d try and clear up a few myths, and add a few new facts to the mix.

1) The Weather
It rains more here than it does in other countries because all of England is near the coast. And coastal climates are more temperate and rainy than continental climates. In other words, yes, it rains. A lot.

2) The Accent
No, we don’t all talk the Queen’s English. There’s a lot of accents around. I actually have a secret ambition to move somewhere like Bristol, Liverpool, or Cardiff (seriously, have you ever heard someone Welsh? Go lust after them, not us. Those accents are just so cute) just to pick up an accent, as in Hampshire we don’t really get an accent. But apparently, our voices go up slightly at the end of sentences because we watch too much Neighbours and now think we live in Australia.

3) Royalty and Aristocracy
Yes, I’m English. Yes, we still have a monarchy. No, that does not mean I know the Queen, or that I am in fact related to the Queen. GET OVER IT. You can’t come to England and marry Prince William. It’s not going to happen…end of story.

4) Television
There’s a LOT of awful TV around in every country—but English TV really takes the biscuit. Have you ever watched a soap? I’m talking EastEnders, Corrie, Neighbours…I get the impression the American soaps are all about shallow rich teenagers having affairs and going on shopping sprees. English soaps are about working class old people shouting, getting drunk, and dying. Jeesh, what a way to kick back after work.

5) Doctor Who
OK, so this doesn’t really belong on a list about stereotypes of the English. But I can’t help it, I love it so much. Basically, just watch. Enjoy. Digest. Don’t blame me when you come back for more. First shown in 1963, this TV series quickly gained a cult following in England. It was axed, brought back in a terrible TV movie in ’96, and finally resurrected in 2005. And it’s been going super-strong ever since, creating two spin-offs: The Sarah Jane Adventures (for kids) and Torchwood (definitely not for kids). Oh, and we Whovians were doing space travel and the race of unemotional super nerds THREE YEARS before Trek.

So yeah. In conclusion, England isn’t really all that much like the stereotype…and please watch Doctor Who.

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