7 Things Guys Don't Want to Hear On a First Date

We hope Man-kler Coffinmaker didn't amass these tips from personal experience! O_o —SparkNotes editors

Everyone knows that on a first date (or any date, for that matter), things can get a little awkward. Conversation will fizzle, cell phones will ring, a man will rush through the restaurant screaming that elbow noodles are planning to take over the world, etc. Girls often feel they have to break the awkward spell, which is good—it's their calling in life, I believe. But there are some questions girls shouldn't ask when things get awkward. Here are a few of them:

1. "How many push-ups can you do?"
First thing, girls, is that no guy actually knows how many push-ups you should be able to do before you're considered strong. And whatever number it is, us guys are all afraid that it's probably just a little more than what we can do. So when anybody asks a guy how many push-ups he can do—whether the questioner is a girl he likes or not—he's deathly afraid they'll think he's a wimp if he can only do thirty. (What? No! I can do more than thirty! I swear!)

2. "Did you put on deodorant?" and/or the fatal "This restaurant smells like men's sweat."
Either one of these two comments are capable of stopping a young man's heart. OMG did I forget to put on deodorant before I left? Mom always told me I would if I wasn't careful, but I was so sure I did! Maybe I didn't put on enough! Next time I'll BATHE in deodorant! This is just not the kind of question that will put a man at ease.

3. "Have you ever thought of being an eunuch?"
I think this one is self-explanatory.

4. "I think eunuchs are cute."
Well I don't envy them, all right?

5. "Are there scholarships for eunuchs?"
Quit it with the eunuchs!

6. "Do you think you're going to keep growing?"
Unless the guy is 16 and 6'3", he's going to freeze up when you ask this question. This tells him that you prefer a tall glass of water, and think he's more like one of those little shot glasses you find in bars. You'll bring the doom on yourself, though, when he comes to prom like this.

7. "Are you a virgin?"
The conversation can only go downhill from here.

What are some questions you'd hate to get on a first date?

Related Post: Hate Your First Date?

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