The ABCs of Phobias

A is for "Awesome." B is for "Baffling." C is for "Contribution," and D is for dumbledore21, the author of this posts. —E  (for "Editors")

You probably all know there are lots of types of phobias. I would like to share with you some of the most weird, absurd, and interesting phobias, one starting with every letter of the alphabet. (I personally have Michael Jackson phobia, but that’s a story for another time. By the way, never watch the "Thriller" music video at night. EVER.):

Acerophobia: fear of sourness. How can you be scared of—wait, wait, I get it. It’s that feeling you get right before you eat a sour candy that you were dared to eat.
Bibliophobia: fear of books. GASP! As a proud Sparkler, I am amazed that anyone in the world could even think of being afraid of books.
Caligynephobia: fear of beautiful women. What guy in their right mind is afraid of beautiful women? Well, I guess you would be if the beautiful women were Veela…
Dextrophobia: fear of objects at the right side of the body. What does that even mean? Does it mean, like, your right hand or something? I don’t even know.
Emetophobia: fear of vomiting. Well, I understand, I’m scared of it, too. Good thing I haven’t barfed in almost two years. Oh, crap, I just jinxed it!
Francophobia: fear of France or French culture. I, as a French-speaking citizen of the United States, find this very insulting.
Geniophobia: fear of chins. Seriously?
Hexakosioihexekontahexaphobia: fear of the number 666. I can’t even pronounce this this one.
Ithyphallophobia: Fear of seeing, thinking about, or having an erect penis. Okay, grossicles!
Judeophobia: fear of Jews. ...Ewww, antisemitic much?
Kathisophobia: fear of sitting down. If this were me, I would buy a massage table to lie on at all times. Hey, it doesn’t mean fear of lying down.
Logophobia: fear of words. So it would be like, “Hi, (scream) I (scream) have (scream) Logophobia (scream)."
Maieusiophobia: fear of childbirth. Don’t have—here it comes—sex.
Numerophobia: fear of numbers. But...but...but, what about math?
Obesophobia: fear of gaining weight. I recommend vegetables. And not donuts. Donuts=bad.
Porphyrophobia: fear of the color purple. No Barney for you.
There is no phobia starting with the letter Q. I’m sorry.
Rhabdophobia: fear of being severely punished or beaten by a rod, or of being severely criticized. It also means fear of magic. What? No Harry Potter? But HP is my whole LIFE!
Scriptophobia: fear of writing in public. Who writes in public, anyway? I don’t. I write at my computer, which is where I wrote this post.
Tonitrophobia: fear of thunder. Oh, you haven’t heard of it? It’s the latest thing among puppies and small children.
Urophobia: fear of urine or urinating. People with this phobia must sound like they're giving birth every time they pee, what with all the terrified screaming. Weird.
Vitricophobia: fear of stepfathers. What? What is that supposed to mean? Like the movie? (Is that a movie? I’m really behind on movies. I was actually thinking of The Godfather.) I give up.
Walloonphobia: fear of the Walloons. Okay, okay, but what the heck are Walloons?
Xanthophobia: fear of the color yellow or the word yellow. In Washington State, on the Olympic Peninsula, there’s a town called Forks, where it ALWAYS RAINS. (And my best friend told me they have a really good fudge shop.) So…no sun, no yellow. Everybody’s happy!
There is no phobia starting with the letter Y. I’m sorry.
Zemmiphobia: fear of the great mole rat. I’ve heard of the great pumpkin, but not the great mole rat.

Oh yeah! I found out that my phobia is called Thrillerphobia, which fits my situation perfectly!

Do you have a phobia? What is it?

Related Post: Be Unafraid. Be Very Unafraid.

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