It’s winter and it’s freezing cold. That means bundling up before you even think about stepping outside. Coat, gloves, and scarf—those are all definites. But what about a hat?
To hat or not to hat: that is the winter question.
We know that hats keep us warm and we lose 189 percent of all body heat through our heads, but hats are just so, well, annoying. They’re probably the most annoying inanimate object ever, with Billy the Big Mouthed Bass as a close second.
So, we’ve compiled a list of all of the pros and cons of hat wearing to help you decide if you should hat up this winter or bare head it.
Pros:
No cold head.
Some hats are cute.
Cons:
Head sweat: Sometimes hats work a little too well, if you know what we mean.
Can’t hear: When hats cover your ears, you can barely hear anything and then all of the sudden you’ve agreed to go to a Reba concert when you swear you thought she said Rhianna.
No ponytail: This is a serious hairdo dilemma for girls…and boys who have the personal aesthetic of most petty thieves.
Hat head: Long hair or short, your hair is going to look jacked up all day if you put a hat on even for a minute in the morning.
Fashion issue: There’s no winning when it comes to coordinating your hat. If it matches your scarf and gloves, you’re going to look too matchy matchy. If it doesn’t go with your coat, it’s going to look like you raided the Lost and Found at the ice rink.
Putting it away: Where do you put a hat when you’re not wearing it? Your gloves are already taking up your pockets and it’ll slip out of the sleeve of your coat if you stick it in there. All you can do is hold it.
Easy to lose: Probably because there’s nowhere to put it, hats are so easy to lose. Basically if you wear one, you’re just signing up to give your parents another example of how irresponsible you are. And after losing two jackets this fall, do you really need to add to their arsenal?
This fair and balanced list obviously shows that not wearing a hat is the more sensible choice. And really, how important is a warm head? No one has ever died from catching a cold…but they have died of hat-related embarrassment. Right? Maybe not...but still.
Do you wear hats?
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