A Day Without Cats: Searching for New Sources of Online Cuteness

Where would the internet be without cats? No, we're not talking about the long-running Broadway musical. We're talking about the adorable little creatures whose online antics keep us endlessly entertained. One website wants to find out. For some inexplicable reason, Urlesque has declared 09-09-09 A DAY WITHOUT CATS!

What?!? No Lolcats? No Keyboard Cat? No Ninja Cat? How are we going to maintain sanity? How will we keep ourselves occupied when we're supposed to be doing productive things, like homework?

Fear not! Behind every dark cloud is a silver lining. Today's cat-lessness gives us a golden opportunity to explore new ways to satisfy our cute cravings. We've searched high and low, in every corner of the vast webernet, to bring you these cute-petitors:Newborn babies
Cute factor: Not so cute.

Yawning babies
Cute factor: Mildly cute.

Farting babies
Cute factor: That's gross. Farting isn't cute. OK, fine. It's kind of cute, sometimes.

Mini condiment bottles
Cute factor: Fairly cute, but they would be much cuter if a cat were trying to open them.

Pygmy Jerboa
Cute factor: Oh my god, what the *!@#!@ is that thing?! Gross! Oh wait, maybe it's sort of cute. Nope, it's creepy.

Wrinkly puppies
Cute factor: Not bad. But they would be better without the whining noises.

Kid dressed as his favorite stuffed animal
Cute factor: Seriously, that's just mean. Why would his parents do that to him? Or do you think he actually chose to dress up like that?

Cookies with faces
Cute factor: They're sorta cute, but they look like they might taste like dog biscuits. Blech.

Old people dancing
Cute factor: Awwwww!

Old people dancing to techno
Cute factor: Awesome! (But not cute.)

Little boy dancing to techno
Cute factor: That's freakin' amazing! Cute and cool all at once. Step aside cats: There's a new cutie in town!

So what do you think? Do any of these match up to the fuzzy-cuddle of internet cats? Or are you anxiously awaiting the return of kitties to your online browsing?