So You Wanna Be a SparkLife Writer...

Sparkler peaceonearth34 has written SparkLife posts before, and has some tips on getting published! (We even throw in some of our own tips, too!) Enjoy! —SparkNotes Editors

Who doesn't want to write a Sparklife post? It's fun, it's exciting, and the comment board will praise your very name! (I'm kidding, I'm kidding!)

However, it isn't easy! Anxiety fills your brain, you lose sleep, you check your e-mail every two minutes--suffering through a SparkLife submission can be tough! Luckily, I have posted the stages here for your convenience, so you can tell how long until recovery.

Stage 1: Finding an Idea

You really, really, REALLY want to write the most amazing and exciting SparkLife post ever. Sadly, you can't think of ANYTHING to write about. You pace for hours in your bedroom, thinking. During this period you may consume a dangerous amount of ice cream. You have been warned.

Stage 2: Writing it Down

You've finally decided what you're going to write about, but then you realize you don't know how to write it. You may stare at your laptop screen until 3 o'clock in the morning before you even have the first paragraph finished. "That doesn't sound funny," or, "Never mind, that isn't important," or, "What do I write next!!!???" are common thoughts during this stage. Don't panic. It's going to be OK. (Hopefully.)

Stage 3: Proofreading

You've finally written your awesome article! Now you just absolutely must proofread it because grammar and spelling errors are one big reason posts get rejected. Other things SparkNotes editors say will take your post out of the running are:

• If another Sparkler already wrote a post just like yours (so it's a good idea to go through some archives just to be sure).
• If your post isn't divided into paragraphs.
• The post is only a few hundred words, or way too long, like 1,000.
• The post has nothing to do with high school or college life, or anything even remotely related to high school or college life.
• The post lacks one main point.
• You used really naughty language.

Stage 4: Waiting

You've written it, you've proofread it, you've sent it in, and now you must wait. Wait. Wait. It's agonizing. You stare at the ceiling for hours. You check your email 1000 times every day. You begin to think that they didn't like your article. They didn't think it was funny. You've accidentally sent it to some guy in Estonia. It's the most difficult stage to go through. It'll end eventually. And if it doesn't end in one or two weeks, e-mail again. (Sometimes things get sent to junk mail!)

Stage 5: Receiving Your Confirmation Email

At long last, you will get the email. The one. You'll scream. You'll shout. You'll dance in public, because you're so happy! You're going to be on SparkLife! You quickly mark down the date when an editor has said your article will be published, and begin the countdown.

Stage 6: The Countdown

This period is plagued with worry. "OMG, OTHER SPARKLERS WILL HATE IT!!!" you scream to yourself. You fear rejection and humiliation. As much as one of the editors said he/she loved your article, that little voice inside your head says, "No, No! It sucks!!!! They're all going to hate it and you'll be shunned!! Shunned, do you hear me!!??" These feelings continue all the way until Publishing Day.

Stage 7:  Publishing Day

For a Sparkler, Publishing Day is like an artist's showcase. People come from all over to see it. You feel excitement, fear, bliss, and happiness all rolled into one. You constantly check the comments. Do they like it? Do they not? (They're probably going to like it.)

And that's all you need to know about Sparklife Submission. The best known cure is to just stay calm. Don't worry! Your article will be great.

Wanna submit to SparkLife after reading all that? Send your submission and nickname to contribute@sparknotes.com for consideration!