Taking the "Augh!" Out of August: Surviving the Last Month of the Summer

Well, we're about to enter the most depressing month of summer: August. Why is it the most depressing? For starters, it's really hot and often humid. It's also the month when most people have run out of ideas for fun stuff to do. But the real reason it's the most depressing month of the summer? It's the last one.

But we at SparkNotes are here to help you get through this last month before the rest of your life. Okay, maybe not "through" it, because "through" means "to the other side," and on the other side of August is school. Let's say we'll help you survive the month. Here's how:

Avoid all stores. If there are three more buzzkilling words in the English language than "Back to School," we can't think what they are. Even the word "Sale" tacked on the end of the phrase doesn't help much. We don't care what kind of deals they're offering at the mall; it's not worth seeing those dirty dozen letters in three-foot type everywhere you look.

Don't watch TV. You'll see more evidence of that whole back-to-school phenomenon, and all the promos for the new season will just remind you that your summer of reruns is coming to an end. But if you have to watch TV (we do too), make sure you watch only what has been on your DVR since at least mid-June. There's no better way to relive that start-of-summer mood than by re-watching a few season finales from back in May. And draw out the experience by not zapping those commercials.

Change your clocks. When the days start getting shorter, you know summer is winding down. This is easily remedied: Beginning on the first of the month, start setting your watch and all the clocks in your house five minutes ahead every day. Soon the sun will be setting later than it did on the solstice, and you will have defeated one more daily reminder of the imminent end of your freedom.

Keep your iPod handy. Even if you never leave the house, you're bound to encounter some auditory reminders of the season drawing to a close: cicadas in the afternoon, your school's marching band practicing in the streets, your parents asking with increasing frequency and giddiness if you're ready to go back. But even those noises can't get past a good pair of earbuds and a playlist of your favorite summer songs.

Avoid sunburn at all costs. This is no time to start slacking off on the sunscreen. There's no worse way to spend one of the last weeks of summer than trapped inside with a bottle of aloe vera gel. Better to save that for the first week of school, when some well-timed sun stroke might allow you to miss the whole affair.

Tell us in the comments how you plan to keep the dog days from making you too hangdog.

And if you're having trouble coming to grips with the coming school year, let our Back to School site ease your transition.