We know that right now, it seems like summer is stretched out in front of you, reaching all the way to the horizon. Days and days of limited responsibility and no stress. But the sad truth is that absent a nuclear holocaust, summer will eventually come to an end. (In fact, it'll end even if there is a nuclear holocaust.) Yes, three months seems like a long time now, but think back to mid-March. Does that seem so long ago?
So what are we suggesting you do about it? Well, as the old saying goes, time flies when you're having fun. Here are some ways to keep Labor Day at bay for as long as possible—by turning your summer into a hard, miserable slog.
Work it out. We know it's hard to get a summer job these days, so try this: Get three. If you're working a hundred hours a week, you won't believe how much you'll find yourself looking forward to September. And since you won't have time to spend any of the money you're earning until the fall, your back-t0-school wardrobe fund is going to rival that of Lady Gaga.
Reap what you sow. Summer break originated back in the agrarian days of yore as a way for kids to help Ma and Pa on the farm during harvest time. (Seriously, look it up.) Fast food and the global marketplace might have eliminated that need, but that doesn't mean you can't connect to your roots (pun, unfortunately, intended). Spend your summer toiling in the soil: if it's good enough for the First Lady, it's good enough for you. Even if you live in a tiny apartment, you'll be amazed how much time and tedium it takes to get a lousy avocado seed to sprout.
Get in touch with your inner antipodean. Since you're not in school, we'll spot you the word "antipodean," which means "on the other side of the earth." Suffice to say that right now, in the Southern Hemisphere, it's the dead of winter and people don't even have Christmas to look forward to. Consider establishing a pen-pal relationship with someone in Australia or Argentina. And then empathize with all their snow-and school-bound woes.
Watch the clock. Remember that episode of The Simpsons, where Bart's in detention and he's staring at the clock so desperately that it actually begins to tick backwards? There's no rule that says that'll only work in detention. Park yourself in your bedroom (or better yet, your parents' bedroom, where it's a lot more boring) on any perfect summer day, while your friends are all out having fun. You'll be amazed at how slowly the seconds can crawl by.
Overshoot the reading list. You probably have a few classics to read before the school year starts. We suggest mowing through those as quickly as possible. When you're done, inhale the entire collected works of Shakespeare, Milton, Dante (preferably in the original Italian), and Meyer. Just think how much you'll enjoy your math textbook in the fall after making it through all of that.
Use the comments to share your own ideas for stretching out the summer. And take your time.
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