Say It In Swahili

When you first registered for high school classes, your language options probably went a bit like, “Well, you could take Spanish, or French, or German or… did we already mention Spanish?”

What can you do if you’re a language buff who’s not satisfied with your school’s offerings? If you live in or near a fairly large city then there are probably colleges and language institutes in your area that offer dozens of options. If you don’t have anything like that within driving distance you might try language software or an online program. Either way, your options are limited only by your imagination and the strength of your internet connection.  Think of how impressed everyone would be if you returned from summer vacation speaking fluent Hindi. Here are a few languages to consider:

Chinese (Mandarin) (官話)

Spoken by roughly a billion people, Mandarin is the most common of the Chinese languages, and is a hot commodity for anyone from international businesspeople to those hoping to backpack through the Chinese countryside. Plus, learning any language with a radically different alphabet makes you look like a genius.

Russian (русский язык)

Besides being a magnet for literature buffs (many of the world’s best books are Russian), the Russian language holds the title as the world’s most intimidating-sounding language, with the possible exception of Klingon. Combining these two strengths makes it the perfect tongue in which to have fiery debates about Pushkin, Tolstoy, or ballet.

Arabic (العربية)

The language of the day for political wonks is also perfect for lefties tired of smearing pencil across their hands and schoolwork, as Arabic is written right to left. Like Chinese, Arabic will also earn you bonus points for mastering a completely unfamiliar alphabet.

Swahili (Kiswahili)

One of the more widely spoken languages from a continent that’s bizarrely overlooked by even many college language programs, speaking Swahili will raise your IQ, make you more popular, and cause romantic partners to flock to you like bees to the hive. We virtually guarantee it.

How do your school’s language offerings stack up? (And for our bi and tri-lingual Sparklers, what languages do you speak?)