Facebook TMI

Slowly and grumpily, we're getting used to the New Twitter Facebook.

But we're still struggling with the barrage of boring, oversharing, TMI-ing status updates. We've decided there are a few things no one—not us, not you, not Ashton—should share with the world. For example:

SparkNotes really has to pee

SparkNotes has become a woman

SparkNotes is really sorry, [boyfriend's name], but thinks we've just grown apart and should probably break up, but don't worry, because it's not you, it's us

SparkNotes is walking into the kitchen

SparkNotes wonders what was in that burrito 'cause it's really not sitting well with us
SparkNotes had this really weird dream last night. We were at school but it wasn't really school, and you were there but you weren't really you. And then this unicorn came in but it wasn't really a unicorn, it was more like a donkey. It was so weird!

SparkNotes is walking into the living room

SparkNotes wishes it was Friday (Note: we all do.)

SparkNotes is tired

SparkNotes is hungry

SparkNotes have a nice day!

SparkNotes wants to [explicit things] with [boyfriend's name]

SparkNotes is studying

SparkNotes is watching TV

Tell us what kind of updates are ruining your Facebook experience. And follow our scintillating updates on Twitter!