Would You Rather: School Uniform Edition

Even though I went to an all-girls Episcopal prep school, I didn't have to wear a uniform. Fortunately, this meant that I didn't have to dress like a movie theater usher, a sailor, Diane Keaton, or a stripper on her day off. Unfortunately, it also meant that five days a week, I had to get up an extra two minutes early to decide which items from my floor to throw on my body. The necessity of choosing my own clothes almost made me pine for pleats, synthetic fabrics, and a clip-on tie. Almost.

There are many arguments for and against uniforms. But too often, we define "uniforms" as "khakis and polo shirts," or "plaid skirts and navy sweaters." Let's get more creative, shall we?

Your SparkNotes editors present: Would You Rather: School Uniform Edition.

• Would you rather...wear your gym uniform as your everyday school uniform OR your school mascot’s costume?

Things to consider: kneesocks, breathing

• Would you rather...wear a paper uniform OR a chainmail uniform?

Things to consider: sweat, rust

• Would you rather...have a uniform that plays your very own soundtrack OR a hypercolor uniform that changes color when touched?

Things to consider: canned applause, sneaking off to make out behind the library

• Would you rather...have to wear a spring uniform in winter OR a winter uniform in spring?

Things to consider: goosebumps, pit stains, circulation

• Would you rather...wear a spandex uniform OR a uniform involving Hammer pants?

Things to consider: love handles, camel toe, breakdancing

• Would you rather...wear a leather uniform OR a silk uniform?

Things to consider: sweat (again)

• Would you rather...wear the opposite sex's uniform OR a unisex orange jumpsuit?

Things to consider: drafts, feminism, being mistaken for a convict

• Would you rather...wear the Hogwarts school uniform OR the Constance Billard School for Girls'/St. Jude School for Boys' uniforms?

Things to consider: cool robes, Jimmy Choos on Wednesdays

Let us know which you'd rather, or add your own in the comments.