There’s No "I" in Group Project

Group projects are divisive. Some students view them as an opportunity (see Types A, C and E below), while others would rather have their toenails pulled out by Digger the Lamisil dermatophyte than pair up with classmates. Working in teams has a way of bringing out a person’s—shall we say—quirks. At SparkNotes, we’ve noticed a special dynamic that sprouts up whenever the words “count off into small groups” are uttered. Ever worked on a group project with one of the following types?

A) Captain Controlling

Type A with a capital, italicized, bolded, 14-point “A.” Some teachers might call this the group “leader,” but we call him a fascist. You’ll learn very quickly that it’s the Cap’s way or the highway. He dominates conversation and apparently did not learn everything he needs to know in kindergarten, because he doesn’t know how to listen. Any input from other team members will be met with withering scorn from the angry captain.

B) The Stress Case

You’ll know you’ve got a Stress Case on your hands when you get an email with the subject line: “OMG!!!!! Group B already has an outline!!!!” Simply put, working in groups really, really, really stresses this student out. Remind her everyone works at a different pace, and set deadlines for your group to meet along the way, so her head doesn’t implode from anxiety.

C) The Slacker

This team player will see the group project as a chance to hit cruise control and coast on other people’s hard work. He'll pretend he doesn’t know how to do something himself (“Dude, can you explain to me how to use Excel again? These spreadsheets are so confusing!”), thus tricking you into deciding it's easier to do the work yourself than explain it to him.  He’ll also arrive at meetings with elaborate excuses for why he didn’t get his part of the project done (“Dudes, I’m so sorry I didn’t do my research on the natural resources of Zimbabwe, but my cat got this really weird rash thing last night and went into anaphylactic shock and my whole family had to drive her to the vet two towns over"). You’ll spend the better part of each meeting doing his work for him.

D) “I Dunno”

The team member who answers every question with a glassy-eyed “I dunno” is not necessarily a slacker. He just has no opinion. On anything. He will be about as helpful as a paper cup with a hole in the bottom.

E) The Thief

You know her, and you hate her. The Thief is stealthy. Like a terrorist sleeper cell, she lies dormant while your group works its tail off to meet deadlines and turn in a sparkling finished project. You may even mistake her for a Slacker or an “I Dunno”…until you walk in on your Thief saying to your teacher, “Why, thank you, Miss Schnauzerbottom! While I put in many, many hours on this project and found myself sometimes frustrated by my team members’ lack of  inspiration and get-up-and-go, I also feel that the project turned out rather well under my leadership.” No one likes a snitch, especially an overworked and underpaid teacher, but in this case, you should let your teacher know that you saw the division of work within your group in a slightly different light. Some teachers make a postmortem part of every group project; if yours doesn't, suggest it, so that next time the Thief pays for her crimes.

Tell us what you think about group projects. Love ‘em, hate ‘em, tips for dealing with difficult team members?