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Other Skills = Mad Skillz

Other Skills = Mad Skillz

By Dan_Bergstein

Summer is approaching, and that means it's time to look for seasonal work. Thanks to the economy, finding a job this season is going to be tough. One way to get noticed is to fill out the application correctly, paying particular attention to the box asking you to list "Other Skills."

Some people leave this field blank, while others simply list their favorite computer software. Those people are fools. If you have mad skills, now is the time to let them shine.

Common Application Response

Please List Other Skills:

I am familiar with Windows XP and Vista.

Amazing and Memorable Application Response

Please List Other Skills:

I can fold anything in half. Dogs love me. I can climb stairs three at a time. I can sing higher than you'd expect. I know how David Blaine did that one trick with the card. I box…sort of. I kill ants. I can move my eyes back and forth faster than most people. I can accurately predict a film's ending 67% of the time. I have all my teeth. I can read any book and eat any meal. Though I've never tried it, I'm probably great at kite-surfing. I have 583 Facebook friends, and one of those friends was on The Real World. I can take a shower without getting my feet wet. I know a lot about wombats. I can make anything into a table or pillow. I can turn 58 paperclips into a coat hanger in less than 20 minutes. I drink more water than most people I know. I get a lot of mail. I'm subway savvy. I don't steal. I make my own stress balls out of balloons and old Nerf footballs. I can find fault with every time-travel story or film. When I pat my chest at the correct intervals, it sounds like a horse is approaching, and then galloping away. I'm good at holding hands. I know nothing about Russian history, but I can usually fake my way through most Russian history conversations. I can turn any mug into a pencil holder. I have never broken a bone. I can identify poison ivy. I'm great at Clue. I can search for things on the internet very well. I believe I can make a red stoplight turn green just by concentrating.  I know how to make ginger ale. I can draw ducks. I know the Pythagorean Theorem by heart. I can mow the lawn in one continuous, nonintersecting line. I make a mean meatloaf. I'm tall. And I'm familiar with Windows XP and Vista…and Mac OS X!

Topics: Life
Tags: facebook

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